Parenting is one of the greatest privileges and responsibilities in life. But let’s be honest—it’s also one of the hardest. As parents, we’re constantly guiding, correcting, and teaching our children. Yet in Matthew 7:1–5, Jesus gives us a lesson that reshapes how we approach parenting: look at yourself first before correcting others.
He says, “Why do you look at the speck in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?” It’s a striking image that speaks volumes. As parents, it’s easy to spot a child’s attitude, mistake, or disobedience, while overlooking our own impatience, pride, or harsh words.
The truth is, children often mirror what they see. If we correct them out of anger or hypocrisy, they learn to tune out our words. But when we acknowledge our own weaknesses, model humility, and seek God’s forgiveness, we earn their respect and show them what grace looks like in action.
This doesn’t mean we never discipline our kids. In fact, discipline is a vital part of loving them well. But the how matters. Correction offered with love, consistency, and empathy is far more effective than correction delivered in frustration. The goal isn’t simply to change behavior—it’s to shape character and point them to Jesus.
So how do we “remove the plank” in parenting? It starts with self-reflection. Ask:
- Am I modeling the behavior I want to see in my children?
- Am I correcting them out of love, or out of irritation?
- Have I asked God to search my own heart before addressing theirs?
When we parent from this place of humility, we create an environment where grace flows both ways. Our kids learn that they don’t have to be perfect to be loved, and that mistakes are opportunities for growth, not shame.
Jesus ends His teaching by reminding us that only when the plank is removed can we truly help others see clearly. That’s true in our families, too. The more we deal with our own hearts first, the more we’ll parent with clarity, patience, and compassion.
Parenting isn’t about perfection—it’s about pointing our children to the One who is perfect. And the best way to do that is to live out the same grace we want them to experience.